Touch

When you are away from home for extended periods of time there are obvious things that you miss. When you are away and are with people you just met, the list of things is longer. One thing that I miss is touch.
I am a touchy-feely person. I love hugs. When you are with your friends there is a different level of intimacy which allows touch. It can be as simple as sitting beside them and your leg or arm touches; when you are laughing at their joke give them a little nudge or touch their arm; if they say something rude you can give them a little twap on the arm. All little things that you don't necessarily think about when you are with people you know and love.
On other out of town shows that I have done there has been the obligatory opening night hug, closing hug and that is it.
I am thinking about this right now because it is Opening Night tonight and I am thinking about hugging some people that I really don't want to. But this company has been touchy from the get go. When we broke for Christmas on Christmas Eve, just five days into rehearsal, everyone was hugging. Same thing on New Year's Eve and again on the last day of rehearsal in Calgary.
I am also very fortunate to have a handful of really good people on this show. Guys that I have worked with just once before, or one guy that is just a staple in the Calgary theatre community. We have all been having a rough time on this one, but certainly they see what I have been going through. They make a point of putting a hand on my shoulder as they pass me in the wing, or giving my arm a rub as we wait in standby, or a hand on my knee before they get up from a conversation. (Keep in mind they also approach conversations with their heads tilted and a soft tone in their voice.) But these three cast members are really making the difference for me. To know that they can see how hard this is on me, that it isn't just in my head or I'm a suck.
Touch can make all the difference when it is truly meant.
Then there is Tom Jackson. He is as nice as he appears on TV. He is sweet and kind in action and in word choice. At the top of every show he seeks out each person for a hug. (Most people just hug those around them, if at all, or hug specific people). The nice thing is that I am standing by for a cue at that time but he will seek me out "Where is my Stacey" to make sure I get one. Yesterday I sat beside him during one of my favorite songs in the show and he turned to me and said "I am glad to share this song with you."
All that being said it is still just as bad as it has been since we got here. Yesterday was better as we didn't have rehearsal, just two shows. But the crew is still a problem, I am working incredibly hard as a result. Considering that before I came I was told me problem would be that I am not allowed to touch anything, things are pretty upside down. I do the entire preset and intermission change myself. My props man vacuums and fills waters. I am glad that I get to do it, cause I can trust that it is done and done right. But then I would have insisted that my apprentice come with me so I don't have to do it alone.
Oh well. One more rehearsal in Vancouver this afternoon and then we Open. Should be an interesting day.